Here are the Brighton Half Marathon 2007 results (pdf). As you will see - I finished one thousand, five hundred and third out of three thousand two hundred or so - in the top half - and with a time of 1 hour 50 minutes and 13 seconds. I really can’t believe I did it - not only that I completed it, but that I completed it in such a cracking time. I’m paying for it today though - my right knee is almost unbendable!

The course took us from Maderia Drive, past the pavillion and St Peters Church toward London Road, back down through the Laines and the Lanes onto the sea front. Here, the course headed west toward Hove Lawns and the Lagoon - my usual run - turning back on itself Eastwards at Fatboy’s house back toward the Piers and the Marina.

I started off running pretty fast - not sprinting - but at a good pace. Running through town was fun - it was early and the race pack was huge. It was exhilarating running with so many others! By the time i’d reached the end of Hove lawns however - the 4 mile stage - I felt knackered. I wasn’t really in the frame of mind to be honest. I know that sounds strange, but all those people overtaking me coupled with the shame of daylight (I was bright pink) and the fact that Sean and Will had both overtaken me, sprinting off into the distance, made me feel a bit disheartened. I plugged away however, stopping only briefly for water at the half way stage.

As usual, it did start to get easier after 7 miles - the rythmical bobbing of my head now feeling normal - the crowds of joggers dissapating to give me more room improving my mood. I reached the Pier, en route - so I thought - to the Marina, passing the Southern FM clock which read 1hr 10mins. By this time i’d completely lost track of the milage so spent the best part of Marine Parade’s uphill struggle trying to work out if that was a good or bad time - a welcome distraction.

Then came the pain barrier. I reached Dukes Mound expecting to carry on to the Marina, but the course veered back down onto Maderia Drive and toward the start/finish line! The way the course was laid out, it appeared that I had nearly finished. I knew this couldn’t be true! Of course - it wasn’t. The race carried on around some chicanes toward the finish line, but then away again, up the hill and along the cliff top above the marina - an impossible distance it felt.

I reached the far end of the marina, further than i’ve ever been before, where the course led down a steep concrete path to a shoreline walkway i didn’t even know existed! Now when I say steep - I mean steep steep. I just wanted to roll down it - every footstep feeling like someone firing a pneumatic drill against my feet, the pressure manifesting in my already shot knees. It was here I felt my right knee twinge, practically making me fall over. I stopped at the side to stretch but, knowing the finish line was close, and seeing the 12 mile marker post, I soldiered on, conscious of making my best time.

I reached Maderia Drive again and focussed hard on the white of the finish tent now in sight - the real finish line this time! At the 800m marker post everyone around me started sprinting. I checked my stopwatch - 1hr 47. I knew I’d done it in under 2hours! The relief was immense! I ditched any thoughts I had of sprinting and even contemplated walking to the finish line. I hobbled my way forward to the huge crowd of people cheering and clapping. Amoungst the noise I heard a group of girls calling my name - but I was too tired and focussed on the end to look - ignorantly pushing on. The shouts later turned out to be from Jane and Co (Thanks for cheering me on ladies and sorry we didn’t meet :-() At last it was over and I was knackered!

I met Sean and finally the others by the cold grey of the seafront, where we stood around exhausted but excited that we’d done it. The goodie bags were sweet - literally - free dried apricots, chocolate and an energy drink as well as tin foil body raps and of course our little medals! We hobbled to HaHa for lunch where I did what only true Englishmen can do after running 13.2miles - got absolutley shit faced! 8 pints or so later, at 7pm, I was home in bed nursing the mother of all headaches, my injured right knee and a blister the size of my little toe on the ball of my foot.

Would I do it again? Hmm. Yes. I think so. Would I do a whole Marathon? Probably not. But never say never ey!

So the thank you’s. First and foremost - thank you to everyone who has sponsored me. I really appreciate it - you’re all fantastic! A big thanks to Jess (congrats on your 1.57 time! wicked!), Caroline, Jay and all the other staff from the Otium Gym. It was your inspiration (and stupid treadmill competitons!) that got me into running and spurred me on to do this in the first place. Thanks also to Lottie for coming out training with me. Thanks to the Fratellis, Bloc Party, Razorlight, Arctic Monkeys, the Kooks, Hard-Fi, Kings of Leon and all the other bands who have kept me entertained on those long evenings! And Finally - thanks I guess to Rachel - for dumping me. If you hadn’t done that, i’d almost certainly still be the fat 13stone unfit bastard I was rapidly becoming and would never have dreamed of doing something like this!

If you haven’t already sponsored me, I’m raising money all year for the Amani Childrens Home, so you can of course post-race sponsor me here!

Some photos of David’s Half Marathon Run by the way!

I can’t beleive i finished a half marathon today! What an achievement! Firstly, I want to say congrats to Lottie, Will and Sean for finishing it too. Wanna know my time?? Sponsor me here - once I’m over £200 i’ll let u know!

P.S. It was under 2 Hours!!!

Last night I did 11 miles - 17.7 Kilometers! Thats 2 miles short of the half marathon. My time - 1 hour 42 minutes. Now i’m asking myself - can I complete it in under 2 hours?!

I spent a large part of the run last night naming my courses. Thus far I’ve got:

• Meet the Fatboy - 9K - ‘hey what you doing tonight?’ - ‘meeting the fatboy’
• Fatboy’s old lady - 10K - He will be buried here - with Brighton’s old lady
• Fatboy Fallen Fatboy - 11 miles - With double the old lady!
• The Noble Fatboy - 8 miles - ‘Amusing’ Northern owners - get it?
• The Concrete Lagoon - 17K - I got bored of the fatboy related names.

Anyway - last night the fatboy fell over. 11miles. Can’t believe it!

By the way - children stop reading now - Paula Radcliffe - I shall NEVER take the mickey out of your street poo incident again. EVER. I fully understand why you did it and very nearly experienced the humiliation for myself (except obviously not in front of millions of people on TV!!)

20 minutes into this evening I felt the colonic pressure.
By the time i’d reached the toilets on Hove lawns for the second time I was bursting - but thanks to Lucy’s story of the ‘cottaging’ which takes place at those particular toilets - I decided to push through and swiftly jogged past. By the time I’d reached them for the third time - and decided enough was enough - it was too late; they were locked. By now the pain was unbearable. I just had to sh*t! I even found a jumper to ‘wipe with’ hanging on the railings of the childrens play park by the West Peir, but just couldn’t bring myself to pick it up. I thought of some poor fooker having to clear up my poo from the street corner, or someone sitting on my poo-covered pebbles, so I soldiered on. Lets just say it was a big relief to finally get home. Maybe thats why my time was so good?!

So why am I telling you this? Well obviously - I want you to all understand the pain I am going through to raise money for orphaned African children I have never met.

Please sponsor me!

On Thursday my Marathon training resumed with a 13K jog with Lottie - my first run in 10 days since my bout of Flu. It was really nice running with someone who can actually run (sorry Alex - you have been well and truly beaten by a girl!) We kept a steady pace and I finished in 1 hour 20 mins - not exactly a world record but it made me happy. Today, I continued with a short 10k before lunch, hungover and in bright sunlight, I subjected the many families enjoying the sun on Hove seafront to my luminous red sweaty face! I realised I run perfectly in time to the beat of Bloc Party - Banquet. The new album is out tomorrow. Exciting! I’m a little obsessed with the Fratellis at the moment too. Jon and I went to the Arc last night for Indie night. So So good! I wonder if we can find an Indie club in Barca?

I didn’t comment on my trip to Manchester, or Cambridge did I?! Find them sneakily added below!